This Writer’s Life—A Time for Focus

by Melissa Corliss DeLorenzo

Photo by Marco Michelini

I, like many writers, I presume, am afflicted with Writer’s Brain. Which means my short-term memory is less than inert. It means I am only half paying attention much of the time. It makes my poor husband crazy. He says something to me and I drag myself away from my far-away thoughts to respond, “What?” a split-second before whatever he just said registers in my distracted brain and I acknowledge his statement. He used to say, “If you heard me, why did you say what?” He doesn’t bother anymore. (But we’ve been married almost ten years.) My mother is taking my daughters to see a children’s play in a few weeks. I know the date—my mother and I formulated an entire plan which involves a median pick-up point in conjunction with a shopping date with a friend of mine. This has been planned for weeks. No, months. And then I went and planned an entirely different activity for that same day. Because I completely forgot about the play, the shopping, the entire thing.

Really?

Lately, in addition to my general preoccupations, I have been experiencing a sensation of disjointedness because I can’t get to the work. At least not at the rate I desire or imagine I “should.” At the onset of the new year, I thought I set some reasonable goals, but I’m having difficulty meeting them. I can’t seem to live up to those expectations. And I have been overwhelmed and as a result, finding I’m lacking in energy to do anything.

Until I stepped back and realized this pressure I was feeling was entirely self-inflicted.

I always have many projects going at once: editing one novel, writing another, working on one of many short stories, seeking opportunities for submission, reading blogs to stay in touch. There is always some project calling to me; usually several. But there are only so many hours in the day. And I always feel plagued by the sensation that I am getting nothing fully accomplished. I have been hesitant to reduce my goals because I won’t get as much done by the end of the year. And yet I’m not getting it done because it seems the goals are not as realistic as I first thought—so what’s the difference?

This week, all of a sudden, I came to understand that it’s time to focus. Do one thing at a time and do it better. Develop one project through to its completion before moving on to another. Ah, a simple shift in perspective!

I am always bursting with ideas, which is not a complaint. Ideas are essential. But unless they are worked through they will never be more than that.
 
I am partial to list-making. So I wrote May through December in a nice straight column down a lined piece of paper. After each month, I wrote a single project. I am hopeful that it will help keep me focused. It’s good to have a plan and a reminder of the task at hand. My goal will be there—written in front of me every day. When you write your goals down, you focus your mind on action. If you want to be a writer, you can’t simply think about writing and all the marvelous ideas you have—you must write.

So, that’s it—there’s the new plan. One thing at a time. Maybe I will become less scattered. With a focused mind, I think I can meet my goals. I may not get as much done as I originally laid out in January, but instead of spinning my wheels, worrying that I’m getting nothing finished, I will get done what I realistically can. And lessening my frustration substantially. I don’t expect to lose my Writer’s Brain, but that’s okay. I think at this point Jim is used to it. Maybe he even finds it charming. It’s simply a matter of perspective.

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